250+ Best Roast Comebacks for Your Brother That Hit Hard

When your brother throws a roast your way, you need comebacks that hit harder and win the sibling banter war.

These 250+ all-new, funny roast comebacks are crafted to shut him down with a playful sting, ideal for family gatherings, game nights, or quick texts.

Written in pure English and safe for all ages, these clapbacks are your ammo for epic brotherly battles.

Ready to out-roast your bro? Dive into this collection and let the burns fly!

Best Roast Comebacks for Your Brother That Hit Hard

Style Slam Comebacks

“You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid.”
“My haircut’s rough? Yours looks like a lawnmower had a midlife crisis.”
“Says the guy whose clothes scream ‘I got dressed in a dumpster.’”
“You’re roasting my shoes? Yours are so old, they’re applying for a pension.”
“My style’s weak? Your closet’s stuck in a 90s time capsule.”
“You’re dissing my shirt? Yours is so loud, it’s waking up the neighbors.”
“My jeans are bad? Yours are so faded, they’re writing a retirement speech.”
“You’re calling my look trash? Your fashion’s banned from every mirror.”
“My cap’s lame? Yours is so worn out, it’s begging for a funeral.”
“You’re roasting my style? Yours is so bad, it’s scaring off thrift stores.”

Tech Takedown Comebacks

“You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial.”
“My tech’s outdated? You’d crash a smart toaster trying to use it.”
“You’re laughing at my laptop? Yours is so slow, it’s running on steam.”
“My texting’s slow? You type like you’re chiseling on stone tablets.”
“You’re dissing my gaming setup? Yours is losing to a flip phone.”
“My selfies are bad? Your camera’s begging for a new owner.”
“You’re roasting my tech skills? You’d unplug Wi-Fi to charge a lamp.”
“My screen’s cracked? Yours looks like it survived a war zone.”
“You’re mocking my earbuds? Yours are so old, they’re wired to the 80s.”
“My tech’s weak? Yours is so ancient, it’s in a museum exhibit.”

Food Fiasco Comebacks

“You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.”
“My snacks are lame? You’d burn cereal and call it a chef’s special.”
“You’re mocking my fridge? Yours is emptier than your chore list.”
“My food combos are weird? Yours are banned from every kitchen.”
“You’re roasting my sandwich? Yours is so sad, the bread’s embarrassed.”
“My cooking’s rough? Your oven’s filing for emotional distress.”
“You’re laughing at my pizza? You’d put ketchup on it and call it art.”
“My snacks are weak? Yours are so bad, the ants are rejecting them.”
“You’re dissing my coffee? Yours is so bad, the beans are protesting.”
“My food’s awful? Your leftovers are scaring the garbage can.”

Social Snafu Comebacks

“You’re calling my talk awkward? Yours makes family dinners a comedy roast.”
“I’m bad at texting? You’re so slow, your phone’s ghosting you.”
“You’re mocking my jokes? Yours are so flat, they’re depressing pancakes.”
“My flirting’s bad? Yours is so weak, it’s banned from family parties.”
“You’re roasting my stories? Yours are so dull, the couch is snoring.”
“My party vibe’s weak? Yours is so bad, the snacks are stealing the show.”
“You’re dissing my banter? Even the dog’s out-roasting you.”
“My social skills are off? Yours are so rusty, they’re creaking.”
“You’re laughing at my chats? Yours are so boring, bots ignore them.”
“I’m awkward? You make group hangs feel like a silent film.”

Gaming Gag Comebacks

“You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing.”
“My aim’s off? Yours is so bad, you’re missing the entire game.”
“You’re mocking my K/D ratio? Yours is so low, it’s in the basement.”
“I’m slow at gaming? Your controller’s collecting dust mid-match.”
“You’re dissing my setup? Yours is losing to a knockoff console.”
“My gaming’s weak? You’re so bad, NPCs are embarrassed for you.”
“You’re laughing at my gamer tag? Yours is cooler than your actual skills.”
“I camp too much? You’d camp in the menu and call it a plan.”
“You’re roasting my win streak? Yours is shorter than your attention span.”
“My gaming’s bad? You’re so bad, the bots are throwing pity points.”

Fitness Flop Comebacks

“You’re mocking my workout? Yours is lazier than a cat in a sunbeam.”
“My running’s bad? You’re so slow, snails are lapping you.”
“You’re dissing my push-ups? Yours are basically floor naps.”
“I skip gym days? You’d nap through a marathon and call it cardio.”
“You’re roasting my fitness? Your Fitbit’s sending you hate mail.”
“I’m out of shape? Your shadow’s outrunning you.”
“You’re laughing at my yoga? Yours looks like a confused giraffe.”
“My gym selfies are bad? Yours are sweating harder than your reps.”
“You’re dissing my cardio? You think walking to the fridge counts.”
“My workout’s weak? Yours is so chill, it’s practically a coma.”

Music Mishap Comebacks

“You’re mocking my playlist? Yours is so bad, it’s banned from speakers.”
“My singing’s off? Yours is so bad, the neighbors are calling for help.”
“You’re dissing my music taste? Yours is stuck in a dusty vinyl era.”
“I butcher songs? You’d ruin a classic and call it a remix.”
“You’re roasting my dance moves? Yours are scarier than a horror flick.”
“My speakers are bad? Yours are begging for a music intervention.”
“You’re laughing at my karaoke? Yours is so bad, the mic’s quitting.”
“My playlist’s lame? Yours is stuck in a time warp nobody wants.”
“You’re dissing my rhythm? You’d trip over a beat and faceplant.”
“My music’s weak? Yours is losing to elevator tunes.”

Driving Disaster Comebacks

“You’re mocking my parking? Yours is so bad, it’s a YouTube fail video.”
“I miss turn signals? You miss them like you miss every chore.”
“You’re dissing my driving? Your GPS just says, ‘Good luck, bro.’”
“My car’s dented? Yours has more scratches than your logic.”
“You’re roasting my parallel parking? Yours is like bumper cars gone wrong.”
“My road rage is bad? Yours is louder than your car’s busted muffler.”
“You’re laughing at my driving? Yours is so bad, road signs are mocking you.”
“My car’s a mess? Yours is begging for a break from your ‘skills.’”
“I get lost? You’d get lost in our driveway with a map.”
“You’re dissing my driving? Yours is so rough, potholes are complaining.”

Room Wreck Comebacks

“You’re calling my room messy? Yours is auditioning for a landfill role.”
“My desk’s cluttered? Yours is so bad, it’s a chaos champion.”
“You’re mocking my cleaning? Your dust bunnies are forming a gang.”
“My room smells? Yours is like a gym sock and bad choices collided.”
“You’re dissing my floor? Yours is begging for a hazmat team.”
“My bed’s unmade? Yours is staging a sheet uprising.”
“You’re roasting my closet? Yours is so chaotic, it’s scaring hangers.”
“I lose stuff in my room? You’d lose your phone and blame ghosts.”
“You’re laughing at my mess? Yours is a biohazard zone.”
“My room’s bad? Yours is so messy, Mom’s calling it a disaster area.”

Chore Catastrophe Comebacks

“You’re dissing my dishes? Yours are so bad, the sink’s on strike.”
“I’m bad at laundry? Your clothes are planning a breakout.”
“You’re mocking my chores? Your vacuum’s collecting dust from neglect.”
“I don’t clean? Your ‘cleaning’ leaves the house messier than before.”
“You’re roasting my trash skills? Your bin’s overflowing with shame.”
“I skip chores? Your broom’s begging for a new owner.”
“You’re laughing at my laundry pile? Yours has its own zip code.”
“I dodge chores? You dodge them like you’re dodging responsibility.”
“You’re dissing my cleaning? Your dust’s throwing a party.”
“My chores are bad? Yours are so bad, Mom’s using you as a warning.”

Sibling Squabble Comebacks

“You’re calling me annoying? Even the dog’s picking my side over you.”
“I borrow your stuff? You’re so bad at sharing, toddlers are judging.”
“You’re mocking my comebacks? Yours are weaker than your Wi-Fi.”
“I’m loud? You make family dinners sound like a rock concert.”
“You’re dissing my pranks? Yours are so bad, they’re failing prank school.”
“I steal snacks? You swipe mine and call it a ‘family tax.’”
“You’re roasting my arguments? Yours are dumber than a reality TV plot.”
“I’m bad at apologies? Your ‘sorry’ needs a translator.”
“You’re calling me chaotic? You’re the king of family drama.”
“I’m annoying? You’re so bad, I’m nominating you for Chaos Bro of the Year.”

School Struggle Comebacks

“You’re mocking my grades? Yours are so low, they’re digging for oil.”
“My homework’s bad? Your textbooks are embarrassed for you.”
“You’re dissing my studying? Yours is lazier than a sloth on vacation.”
“I sleep through tests? You’d nap through a quiz and call it a break.”
“You’re roasting my notes? Yours are messier than your life choices.”
“My math’s bad? You think 2+2 is a personality trait.”
“You’re laughing at my essays? Yours are so bad, the teacher’s sighing.”
“I’m slow at studying? Your desk’s growing cobwebs.”
“You’re dissing my projects? Yours look like a last-minute panic attack.”
“My school game’s weak? Your backpack’s begging for a new student.”

Fashion Faux Pas Comebacks

“You’re mocking my outfit? Yours is so bad, it needs a warning label.”
“My style’s off? You dress like you’re allergic to mirrors.”
“You’re dissing my shoes? Yours are so old, they’re collecting Social Security.”
“My wardrobe’s bad? Yours is stuck rocking flip phones.”
“You’re roasting my look? Your closet’s screaming for a makeover.”
“My socks are lame? You’d wear sandals in winter and call it bold.”
“You’re laughing at my accessories? Yours are louder than your snoring.”
“My clothes are mismatched? Yours are staging a fashion riot.”
“You’re dissing my fashion? Yours is so retro, it’s in a history book.”
“My style’s weak? Your wardrobe’s hiding from a fashion show.”

Social Media Slip-Up Comebacks

“You’re mocking my posts? Yours are so dull, bots are scrolling past.”
“My selfies are bad? Yours are thirstier than a desert cactus.”
“You’re dissing my hashtags? Yours are trending in obscurity.”
“My Stories are lame? Yours are duller than a tax seminar.”
“You’re roasting my pics? Yours are so blurry, they’re ‘aesthetic’ fails.”
“My likes are low? Yours are lonelier than a ghosted chat.”
“You’re laughing at my captions? Yours are writing themselves in shame.”
“My profile’s outdated? Yours is stuck in a 2005 time warp.”
“You’re dissing my livestream? You’d stream a nap and expect fame.”
“My social media’s weak? Yours is so bad, it’s banned from Wi-Fi.”

Time Management Tangle Comebacks

“You’re calling me late? Your clock’s giving you the cold shoulder.”
“My schedule’s messy? Yours is messier than your laundry pile.”
“You’re mocking my procrastination? Your to-do list’s on life support.”
“I’m bad at time? Your alarms are throwing shade at you.”
“You’re dissing my plans? Yours are so chaotic, calendars are quitting.”
“I’m late? You’d be late to your own party.”
“You’re roasting my deadlines? Yours are lonelier than a deserted island.”
“I’m slow? You’re so slow, snails are challenging you to a race.”
“You’re laughing at my time management? Yours is stuck in a time loop.”
“My timing’s off? You’d miss a bus parked in the driveway.”

Party Pooper Comebacks

“You’re mocking my party vibe? Yours is so weak, the balloons are deflating.”
“My dancing’s bad? Yours is so bad, the DJ’s playing lullabies.”
“You’re dissing my stories? Yours are so dull, the snacks are the stars.”
“I spill drinks? You’d spill one and call it a party trick.”
“You’re roasting my party game? Yours is so bad, the walls are more fun.”
“My karaoke’s bad? Yours is so rough, the mic’s begging for mercy.”
“You’re laughing at my dance moves? Yours are banned from every club.”
“My party’s boring? You’re so dull, the punch bowl’s outshining you.”
“You’re dissing my costume? You’d show up dressed as ‘tired.’”
“My party skills are weak? Yours are so bad, the confetti’s embarrassed.”

Snack Stealer Comeback Slams

“You’re calling me a snack thief? You’re so bad, I’m locking the pantry.”
“I steal food? You swipe my chips and call it a ‘taste test.’”
“You’re mocking my snacking? Your raids are faster than your chores.”
“I eat your snacks? You’re so sneaky, the fridge is judging you.”
“You’re dissing my food grabs? You’d steal my pizza and call it bonding.”
“My snack game’s weak? Yours is so bad, the ants are boycotting.”
“You’re roasting my munchies? You’re the ninja of crumb theft.”
“I take your leftovers? You’d eat mine and call it a favor.”
“You’re laughing at my snacks? Yours are so bad, the kitchen’s ashamed.”
“I’m a food thief? You’re so bad, I’m hiring a snack bodyguard.”

Brainiac Burn Comebacks

“You’re mocking my brain? Yours is so slow, it’s buffering last year’s jokes.”
“I’m bad at trivia? You’d lose to a goldfish in a quiz.”
“You’re dissing my logic? Yours is doing backflips in a storm.”
“My math’s bad? You’d argue with a calculator and lose.”
“You’re roasting my memory? Yours is so bad, you forgot your own burn.”
“I’m bad at puzzles? Yours are so bad, crosswords solve themselves.”
“You’re laughing at my ideas? Yours are banned from family debates.”
“I overthink? You’d overthink a yes-or-no into next week.”
“You’re dissing my smarts? Yours are so weak, they’re unemployed.”
“My brain’s slow? Yours is so bad, it’s stuck in a loading screen.”

Fitness Fumble Comebacks

“You’re mocking my gym game? Yours is lazier than a Sunday nap.”
“I’m slow at running? You’re so bad, turtles are passing you.”
“You’re dissing my push-ups? Yours are basically floor hugs.”
“I skip workouts? You’d nap through a 5K and call it cardio.”
“You’re roasting my fitness? Your Fitbit’s sending you warning letters.”
“I’m out of shape? Your shadow’s outrunning you.”
“You’re laughing at my yoga? Yours looks like a confused scarecrow.”
“My gym selfies are bad? Yours are working harder than your reps.”
“You’re dissing my cardio? You think walking to the fridge counts.”
“My workout’s weak? Yours is so bad, your yoga mat’s quitting.”

Travel Tangle Comebacks

“You’re mocking my navigation? You’d get lost in our own house.”
“My packing’s bad? Your suitcase is begging for a therapist.”
“You’re dissing my travel plans? Yours are messier than your room.”
“I miss flights? You’d miss one parked in the garage.”
“You’re roasting my playlist? Yours is so bad, the car’s muting you.”
“I’m bad at directions? Your GPS is throwing shade at you.”
“You’re laughing at my packing? Your bag’s applying for a refund.”
“I get lost? You’d get lost in a mall with a guide.”
“You’re dissing my travel stories? Yours are duller than a layover.”
“My trips are bad? Your passport’s hiding from embarrassment.”

Phone Fumble Comebacks

“You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a social life.”
“My texting’s bad? Your autocorrect’s working overtime for you.”
“You’re dissing my screen? Yours looks like a spider web art project.”
“I drop my phone? You’d drop yours and call it a water test.”
“You’re roasting my notifications? Yours are lonelier than a dead chat.”
“My selfies are bad? Your camera’s begging for a vacation.”
“You’re laughing at my battery? Yours dies faster than your comebacks.”
“I lose my phone? You’d lose yours in your pocket and panic.”
“You’re dissing my texting speed? Yours is stuck in the 90s.”
“My apps are bad? You’d crash a flashlight app with one tap.”

Morning Mishap Comebacks

“You’re mocking my mornings? You’re so slow, the sun’s lapping you.”
“I’m bad at waking up? Your alarm’s filing for early retirement.”
“You’re dissing my bedhead? Yours is starring in a jungle movie.”
“I sleep in? You’d nap through a fire drill and call it rest.”
“You’re roasting my coffee? Yours is working harder than you.”
“My mornings are rough? Yours are so bad, roosters are laughing.”
“You’re laughing at my snooze? Yours is so overworked, it’s striking.”
“I’m slow to get up? Your breakfast’s eating itself.”
“You’re dissing my morning vibe? Yours is embarrassing the sun.”
“I’m bad at mornings? You’d trip over your feet rushing nowhere.”

Movie Night Misfire Comebacks

“You’re mocking my movie picks? Yours are so bad, Netflix hides them.”
“I nap during films? You’d sleep through the opening credits.”
“You’re dissing my popcorn? Yours is sadder than your movie taste.”
“My movie choices are bad? You’d pick a rom-com and cry harder.”
“You’re roasting my taste? Yours is banned from every streaming app.”
“I spoil plots? You’d spoil a trailer before it starts.”
“You’re laughing at my couch vibe? Yours is stronger than the plot.”
“I talk during movies? You’d talk through a silent film and miss it.”
“You’re dissing my snacks? Yours are so bad, the popcorn’s ashamed.”
“My film picks are weak? Yours are so bad, the TV’s judging you.”

Random Roast Comebacks

“You’re calling me chaotic? Your life’s a reality show nobody watches.”
“My plans are bad? Your calendar’s on a permanent vacation.”
“You’re mocking my logic? Yours is doing flips in a tornado.”
“I’m bad at decisions? You’d lose a staring contest with a wall.”
“You’re dissing my vibes? Yours are confusing a magic 8-ball.”
“My excuses are lame? Yours are weaker than your Wi-Fi signal.”
“You’re roasting my chaos? Yours is scaring off hurricanes.”
“I fumble comebacks? You’d trip over a compliment and cry.”
“You’re laughing at my skills? Yours are so bad, they’re your superpower.”
“I’m a mess? You’re so bad, you’re the king of sibling disasters.”

Why These Comebacks Shine

Nailing the Funny, Hard-Hitting Tone

Comebacks like “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” (style), “You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial” (tech), and “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” (food) blend humor and sharp wit to shut your brother down.

Matching the Context

For a family dinner roast, use “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.” For a text clapback, try “You’re calling me slow at texting? Your autocorrect’s working overtime for you.” For a game night, go “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing.”

Timing for Maximum Impact

Drop “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” at a family meal. Use “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing” during a gaming session. Try “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” when he jabs at your style.

Keeping It Playful

Avoid mean clapbacks like “You’re a loser.” Go for “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” or “You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial” to keep it fun and sibling-friendly.

Personalizing the Comeback

For his style roast, use “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid.” For his gaming jab, try “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing.” For his food diss, go “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.”

Delivery Tips

In a family setting, use “You’re mocking my party vibe? Yours is so weak, the balloons are deflating” with a laugh. In a text, try “You’re calling me slow at texting? Your autocorrect’s working overtime for you” for a quick zing. In person, say “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” with a smirk.

Interaction Context

For gaming roasts, use “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing.” For social jabs, try “You’re calling my talk awkward? Yours makes family dinners a comedy roast.” For food disses, go “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.”

Evolving Your Comebacks

Don’t repeat “You’re lame.” Switch to “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” or “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” to keep comebacks fresh and sharp.

Handling Their Response

If he laughs, say “Got you good, bro, but you know I’m the comeback king!” If he’s salty, try “Chill, it’s just a clapback—your turn to fire back!” If he roasts again, go “Nice try, but my comebacks are still fire!”

Avoiding Harsh Comebacks

Skip cruel lines like “You’re pathetic.” Use “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” or “You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial” for playful, hard-hitting burns.

Teaching Banter

Model “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” to show sibling wit. Share “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing” for sharp flair. Use “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” to inspire playful clapbacks.

When to Keep It Short

For quick comebacks, use “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” for punchy humor. For longer banter, try “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid, and even the thrift store said no.”

Bonus Content: Extra Comeback Ammo

5 Scenarios for Perfect Comebacks

Family Dinner: Use “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” for table laughs.
Game Night: Say “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing” for a gaming clapback.
Text Battle: Try “You’re calling me slow at texting? Your autocorrect’s working overtime for you” for digital zings.
Sibling Hang: Go “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” for a quick jab.
Car Ride: Use “You’re dissing my driving? Yours is so rough, potholes are complaining” for road trip fun.

5 Ways to Elevate Your Comebacks

Add Sharp Wit: Use “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” for biting humor.
Match the Moment: Gaming jab? Go “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing.” Food diss? Try “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.” Party roast? Use “You’re mocking my party vibe? Yours is so weak, the balloons are deflating.”
Keep It Playful: Write “You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial” for a light clapback.
Personalize It: Mention his quirks, like “You’re dissing my cooking, [his name]? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.”
Be Memorable: Use “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” for a comeback he’ll remember.

5 Comebacks to Avoid

Too Mean: “You’re a failure” hurts; use “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” instead.
Too Personal: “Your life’s a mess” stings; try “You’re calling my room messy? Yours is auditioning for a landfill role.”
Too Harsh: “You’re pathetic” bombs; go “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.”
Too Vague: “You suck” flops; use “You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial.”
Too Cruel: “Nobody likes you” fails; try “You’re mocking my party vibe? Yours is so weak, the balloons are deflating.”

5 Follow-Up Actions to Keep It Fun

Laugh together to show it’s all sibling love.
Fire back if he roasts again to keep the banter alive.
Share a snack to cool things down after a zinger.
Record the comeback for family laughs later (with his okay).
High-five to keep the vibe playful and fun.

5 Tips for Crafting Your Own Comebacks

Stay Funny: Use “You’re calling my outfit bad? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” for humor.
Be Sharp or Playful: Try “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing” or “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” for versatility.
Keep It Short but Punchy: Comebacks like “You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial” hit hard without dragging.
Match the Context: Gaming jab? Go “You’re roasting my gaming? Your skills are so bad, the tutorial’s laughing.” Social diss? Try “You’re calling my talk awkward? Yours makes family dinners a comedy roast.” Food roast? Use “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike.”
Show Sibling Vibes: Add “Got you good, bro, but you know I’m the comeback king!” to keep it light.

Conclusion

From style slam clapbacks to snack-stealer shutdowns, these 250+ roast comebacks for your brother will light up your sibling banter with hard-hitting humor. Perfect for keeping the family vibe fun while winning the roast war, you’re ready to fire back like a pro. Want more witty clapbacks? Check out our other guides for more banter ammo!

FAQs

Q. How do I roast my brother back without being too mean?
Use “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” for a funny clapback, and end with a laugh to keep it playful.
Q. What’s a good comeback for a family dinner roast?
Try “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” for table laughs.
Q. Can these work in a text?
Yes! Use “You’re calling me slow at texting? Your autocorrect’s working overtime for you” for a quick digital zing.
Q. How do I make my comeback personal?
Go with “You’re calling my outfit bad, [his name]? Your wardrobe’s begging for a fashion police raid” or mention a quirky habit.
Q. Are these comebacks safe for all ages?
Totally! Use “You’re mocking my phone? Yours is so old, it’s got a rotary dial” or “You’re dissing my cooking? Your food’s so bad, the stove’s on strike” for fun, safe burns.